Dec 31, 2013

2013: Finishing the Unfinished Business

You listened to that assertion. "Find what you like! Follow your passion!" They said. The words seemed so powerful that you could feel how they resonated with every inch of your flesh and soul.

And so you did.

You found what you liked.., no, you found what you (thought you) loved, so much, that you did whatever it took to get it, to have it in your hand. Even though that meant you had to compromise some of your other dreams, your logic, and even let down some important people in your life. 

"It's your life," some people said affirming, "not theirs!" You nodded. So convincing, the brilliant mind as well said, "You've got to find what you love.. There is no reason not to follow your heart!" 

Maybe, if the brilliant mind lived just a little bit longer, he would add something else to that saying. Just maybe.

Then you were saddened by the fact that those things, which you were very fond of, were taken away from you for such and such reasons. It was the loss you predicted, yet still, you felt broken. It took you a while to say, "I made a mistake." Your hypothesis at the time was, "knowing and finding what I love is no doubt important, but logic shall precede it!" It wasn't easy for you but then you told yourself, "at least there was a lesson learned," making peace with everything had happened. 

The journey of striving for what you (think you) loved was tragic, but it did have its costs... And its gifts. You were fine.

Ever since, the logic had played its role a lot more. You questioned stuff. You didn't take things lightly. You countered things you heard and/or saw. Wasn't that good? It was! It made you so confident with every step you took and every plan you made. 

And then, by chance, your journey brought you to someone who gave you something very profound to think about. It made you realize that it wasn't all wrong with following your heart and knowing what you love. The only major problem was, "what if what you thought as 'love', wasn't the right love AND/OR didn't deserve the effort?" To put it simple, "what if your definition of 'love' was wrong?" 

Since then you spent time seeking something you missed earlier - the true definition of love. However, along the way, disappointments seemed to be inevitable. 

You asked yourself, "What did I do wrong? I've planned thoroughly and what's not good with planning things? I've got all the reasons and my feelings have no longer consumed me, shouldn't I deserve better results? Shouldn't things turn out to be better than before?" They didn't and your heart broke even worse. 

A good friend reminded you,
Moses also faced a deadlock, stumbled across the Red Sea being pursued by the Pharaoh. Children of Israel whom he led turned hectic, gripped by panic. "We'll definitely be overtaken! We'll definitely be overtaken!" They said. "No," said Moses. "We will never be overtaken! Indeed, my God is with me, and He will guide me." And the guidance came. Moses was commanded to strike the sea with his staff. Reason without faith says, "What's the point? Better use it to strike the head of Pharaoh!" Yes, even Moses did not know that the water of the oceans would split. All that he knew was God was with him. And it was enough for him.
translated from here.

"Ah," you realized, "I was too confident with my logic that I took God out of the equation..." 

So, has the quest ended? No, it hasn't. At the very least, that's what you're hoping. But it's a good thing that you realized how 'finding what you love' has been the unfinished business for ages and it's time to see the quest from a different perspective.

As you read, it's time to start the new year like Albert Einstein.

"If I had an hour to solve a problem," he said, "I’d spend 55 minutes thinking about the problem and 5 minutes thinking about solutions." You agreed that it's time to get really clear about what's not working, before finally deciding what to do next.

You came to understand that the quest doesn't end at the finding. And you came to understand that it wasn't 'following your heart' nor 'agreeing with your logic' approach that didn't work well. But it was something else..

Have you figured that out? 
Nonetheless, wishing you a year full of blessings and happiness.